everything

I remember the last time I saw this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVJqRLU3J0I.
I was sitting on my couch, on the 2nd of January of this year, with a friend. We were going through youtube videos, laughing at the ridiculousness of Improv Everywhere. He then typed "Everything Lifehouse Skit" in, and this came up. I had seen it before, but I know that it made me tear up.

I watched it again today, and it was so powerful. I mean, it brought back the all too fresh memories from watching it that night, but that aside, it made me stop, and just sit here. It is so, man, I'm lacking words again. There aren't enough, or the right enough adjectives to describe it for me. Christ is so beautiful, and so loving, and so strong. And this skit? It's such a good depiction of us. We go through hell on Earth, and we go running back to Him, realizing that He's all we need. He's all that we could ever want in this world. He is literally everything. It convicts me because I know that my life is not nearly as Christ-centered as I would want it to be. However, even though that's true, it doesn't mean that God loves me any less.

Even though in the past few weeks, I've felt more alone than I have since moving, I know that He will never let me down. He will never abandon me. He will be beside me every step of the way, even if I don't know where I'm going. I don't mind being blindfolded if he leads me, because I trust that it's where I need to go.

It's hard though, because for me to actually realize and understand how much I need him, I have to keep getting smashed, broken. I have to be let down, or hurt. I have to be shown that I have no real control over my life anyway. It sucks, to be broken. Yet, through these moments, I've learned so much. And I'm getting better at forgiving, and at realizing that there's a reason for every bad thing that happens in my life. I trust in the plan that I can't see.